We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
