These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Randomize