i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
