no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
