We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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