i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
