remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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