try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize
