dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
