Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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