Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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