i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
