just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Randomize
