You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
It was like giving head to a cactus.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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