does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
honey bunches of taint.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
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