Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
