So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
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