If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
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