Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
