i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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