Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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