Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
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