What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
