WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
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