What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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