id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
