What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
