We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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