Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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