You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
