sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
