I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
