so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
