i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize