We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
