dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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