I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Randomize
