I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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