I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
