She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
My breasts were aching with rage.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Randomize
