it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
