shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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