I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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