Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
