Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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