Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
