forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
