plz talk dirty to me
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
