If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
