she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
